Geeky Joke

Use this board for general non-cycling-related chat, or to introduce yourself to the forum.

Geeky Joke

Postby kwackers » Wed Mar 02, 2011 2:11 pm

A wife asks her husband, a software engineer; “Could you please go shopping for me and buy one carton of milk, and if they have eggs, get 6!”

A short time later the husband comes back with 6 cartons of milk.

The wife asks him, “Why the hell did you buy 6 cartons of milk?”

He replied, “They had eggs.”



Don't get it myself, but Ms Kwacker's is still occasionally breaking into fits of tittering...
kwackers
 
Posts: 8422
Joined: Wed Jun 04, 2008 9:29 pm
Location: Warrington

Re: Geeky Joke

Postby Mick F » Wed Mar 02, 2011 2:18 pm

Fits of giggles here too.
:lol:

We had a young sailor once who was sent to get a damp cloth. He came back with a dry one saying he couldn't find a damp one.
Mick F. Cornwall
User avatar
Mick F
Spambuster
 
Posts: 28985
Joined: Sun Jan 07, 2007 11:24 am
Location: Tamar Valley, Cornwall

Re: Geeky Joke

Postby chris667 » Wed Mar 02, 2011 3:08 pm

A real geek joke.

Did you hear yoda has decided not to do exception handling?

"Do or do not, there is no try".
Cottered Crank Appreciation Society. Our motto: "Oil it, clamp it, whack it."
User avatar
chris667
 
Posts: 1685
Joined: Fri Sep 19, 2008 4:41 pm

Re: Geeky Joke

Postby kwackers » Wed Mar 02, 2011 3:11 pm

chris667 wrote:A real geek joke.

Did you hear yoda has decided not to do exception handling?

"Do or do not, there is no try".

I'm not sure most people would catch that...
kwackers
 
Posts: 8422
Joined: Wed Jun 04, 2008 9:29 pm
Location: Warrington

Re: Geeky Joke

Postby stewartpratt » Wed Mar 02, 2011 3:17 pm

You just had to throw that in.
stewartpratt
 
Posts: 2286
Joined: Thu Dec 27, 2007 5:12 pm

Re: Geeky Joke

Postby kwackers » Wed Mar 02, 2011 3:30 pm

stewartpratt wrote:You just had to throw that in.

Sometimes you just have to make an exception.
kwackers
 
Posts: 8422
Joined: Wed Jun 04, 2008 9:29 pm
Location: Warrington

Re: Geeky Joke

Postby Si » Wed Mar 02, 2011 4:15 pm

this thread doeth over flow with poor jokes.
User avatar
Si
Moderator
 
Posts: 12209
Joined: Fri Jan 05, 2007 7:37 pm

Re: Geeky Joke

Postby kwackers » Wed Mar 02, 2011 4:18 pm

you could always carry one.

(sorry, throwback to my assembler programming days)
kwackers
 
Posts: 8422
Joined: Wed Jun 04, 2008 9:29 pm
Location: Warrington

Re: Geeky Joke

Postby al_yrpal » Wed Mar 02, 2011 7:19 pm

A young engineer who graduated with distinction, was just about to leave his office at 3.45 p.m. when he found the Acting CEO of the company standing in front of a shredder machine with a piece of paper in his hand.

"Listen," said the Acting CEO, "this is a very sensitive and important piece of paper, and my secretary is not here. Can you make this thing work?"

"Certainly," said the young engineer. He turned the power to the shredding machine ON, pressed the START button and inserted the paper.

"Oh that's excellent, excellent young man!" said the Acting CEO as his paper disappeared inside the shredder, "I just need one copy."

Lesson: Never, ever assume that the CEO knows what he's doing
I'm getting a Pono! And... My current jam http://www.thisismyjam.com/alyrpal/_5syk5x6
al_yrpal
 
Posts: 2889
Joined: Wed Jul 25, 2007 9:47 pm
Location: Chilterns, the bit the gubment havent concreted over (yet) although they are trying..

Really Geeky Joke

Postby al_yrpal » Wed Mar 02, 2011 7:36 pm

Dear Helpdesk

Eighteen months ago I upgraded to Girlfriend 1.0 from Drinking Mates 4.2 which I"d used for years without any trouble. However, there are apparently conflicts between these two products and the only solution was to try and run Girlfriend 1.0 with the sound turned off.

To make matters worse, Girlfriend 1.0 is also incompatible with several other applications, such as Lads Night Out 3.1, Football 2.0 and Playboy 6.1. Successive versions of Girlfriend proved no better. A shareware beta-programme, Party Girl 2.1 that I tried, had many bugs and left a virus in my system, forcing me to shut down completely for several weeks. Eventually I tried to run Girlfriend 1.2 and Girlfriend 1.0 at the same time, only to discover that when these two systems detected each other they caused severe damage to my hardware.

Sensing a way out, I then upgraded to Fiance 1.0 only to discover that this product soon had to be upgraded (at great cost) to Wife 1.0, which I reluctantly agreed to, because, whilst Wife 1.0 tends to use up all my available resources, it does come bundled with FreeSexPlus and CleanHouse2000.

Shortly after this upgrade however I then discovered that Wife 1.0 can be very unstable and costly to run. For example, any errors I made were automatically stored in Wife 1.0's memory and could not be deleted. They then pop-up months later when I had forgotten about them.

Wife 1.0 also has an automatic Diary Explorer and E-mail Porn Filter, and can, without warning, launch Photostrop and Whingezip! These latter products have no Help files and I have to try and guess what the problem is myself.

Additional costly problems are that Wife 1.0 needs updating regularly, requiring Shoe Shop Browser for new attachments and also Hairstyle Express, which needs to be reinstalled every other week. Wife 1.0 also spawns unwelcome child processes that drain my resources. It also conflicts with some of the new games I wanted to try, stating that they are an illegal operation. When Wife 1.0 attaches itself to my Audi TT program it often crashes or runs the system dry.

Wife 1.0 also has a rather annoying pop-up called Mother-in-Law, which can't be turned off. Recently I've attempted to try Mistress 2000, but there could be problems. A friend has alerted me to the fact that if Wife 1.0 detects the presence of Mistress 2000 it could delete all my MS Money files before un-installing itself.

Any ideas?
I'm getting a Pono! And... My current jam http://www.thisismyjam.com/alyrpal/_5syk5x6
al_yrpal
 
Posts: 2889
Joined: Wed Jul 25, 2007 9:47 pm
Location: Chilterns, the bit the gubment havent concreted over (yet) although they are trying..

Re: Geeky Joke

Postby kwackers » Wed Mar 02, 2011 8:37 pm

al_yrpal wrote:A young engineer who graduated with distinction, was just about to leave his office at 3.45 p.m. when he found the Acting CEO of the company standing in front of a shredder machine with a piece of paper in his hand.

"Listen," said the Acting CEO, "this is a very sensitive and important piece of paper, and my secretary is not here. Can you make this thing work?"

"Certainly," said the young engineer. He turned the power to the shredding machine ON, pressed the START button and inserted the paper.

"Oh that's excellent, excellent young man!" said the Acting CEO as his paper disappeared inside the shredder, "I just need one copy."

Lesson: Never, ever assume that the CEO knows what he's doing

That happened for real at a place I once worked. The guy (not a CEO) went to reception to put some mail into the box for posting, asked the secretary where to put it and she nodded towards the corner. Guy walked over and put his mail into the shredder...
Apparently he put up quite a struggle trying to stop it getting pulled in.
kwackers
 
Posts: 8422
Joined: Wed Jun 04, 2008 9:29 pm
Location: Warrington

Re: Geeky Joke

Postby sleeping_menace » Wed Mar 02, 2011 9:12 pm

Image
........................
http://anotherdooratthe.endoftheinternet.org

Cycle related blog entries, including a few 5 minute reviews:
http://anotherdooratthe.endoftheinterne ... y/cycling/
sleeping_menace
 
Posts: 49
Joined: Tue Feb 08, 2011 8:14 am


Return to The Tea Shop

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: broadway and 1 guest